People who keep putting it off usually say nothing. They just keep kicking the decision down the road.
As I always say: a big transformation happens when there's a very big pain or a very big desire. Mine started in 2023.
What the hell am I doing to my body?
That's what I thought at a gym in Barcelona. I'd had another lousy night. I couldn't sleep properly, I couldn't breathe properly, everything was hard. I was particularly bloated, something I would once have seen as a good thing. My head was shaved. And one shoulder was the size of my head.
I looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw at all. What the hell am I doing to my body, to my health and to my life? How much longer am I going to keep this up? And why?
Why is a powerful question when something you've been doing for a long time no longer seems like a good idea. What got me started was curiosity and a love for everything to do with bodybuilding. What kept me there for so long was the image I'd built of myself, the professional side and the validation I got every single day.
By 2023 the curiosity and the love for it were gone. And I was paying a high price for that validation. The logical thing was to cut it off at the root. I cut everything.
And what a feeling of freedom.
Today I'm reasonably lean, with some muscle and a body that works. I lift and do jiu-jitsu and I can recover, without drugs, without peptides and without loads of supplements.
Back then I lived for my body. My whole day was planned around it. Not one gram of rice too many, not one gram too few.
Today I eat out whenever I want and I travel without so much worry. I'm focused on my projects, on Artur and on my social life, and I do it with lightness and joy. Training and food are planned to fit that reality. I no longer have to split my time with bodybuilding, think about training and diet all the time, or inject anything.
I have more physical energy and mental clarity, and I want to keep them for as long as I can. I no longer have a body and a mind working against me. They work in my favour, for whatever needs my attention.
Life has become lighter and simpler, exactly the way I like it.
But this meant leaving a whole life behind.
Investing so much time in something only to let it go isn't easy on the mind. At first glance, it looks like a waste.
There were the comments that would come. The validation I used to get, which would now turn into rejection. And the doubt about whether the price of this freedom would also be too high, in money and in relationships. Because when you change, especially if it's a big change, some people leave.
Looking back, I'm glad I stood firm on my decision. I had no shortage of reasons to kick it down the road.
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